Do you think you use the word “he doesn’t” more and more often when describing your boyfriend to your friends? You know what I mean? He doesn’t do this or he doesn’t do that. “It was always like this, right? At the beginning of your relationship, your boyfriend was probably much more attentive to you in his actions and comments. As time goes on, things can start to change. The simple things, the niceties he once bestowed on you are becoming less and less the little things he used to say or do that made you feel special are fading away this is what I call the “no” factor.
As relationships develop, they sometimes begin to deteriorate. The initial excitement and intimacy begin to fade and we cling to the special feelings we once had. So instead of being able to brag to your girlfriend that your boyfriend buys you flowers or treats you special or likes to snuggle up with you at the end of the day, you find that you’re saying something much more negative.
Did your boyfriend comment on your appearance more often when you first started dating, but doesn’t anymore? He often commented on how great you looked in certain clothes, but he doesn’t anymore? Did your boyfriend used to get up and greet you with a hug and a kiss, but he doesn’t anymore? What about his appearance? He used to make an effort to clean himself up for you, but he doesn’t anymore? There are many more examples like this that you can relate to or recognize. If you can relate to one or more of these statements, then there may be issues with your relationship that need to be addressed.
If you are seeing your boyfriend act in the above way, then it is important that you assess yourself first to make sure that you are not sending him signals that could cause him to act in that way. You have to ask yourself if you are using the “no” factor against him. Make your feelings have changed at all. If so, they may be aware of that and react to what you’re doing. If you honestly feel like you haven’t changed, you may need to address these issues with your boyfriend.